Jenn: Sure hope it isn't Jamie you have been seeing cuz I just told her we've been seeing each other again.
Me: Wtf are you talking about?
Jenn: Jamie is what i'm talking about. I said hope she isn't one of the bois you're talking about.
Me: I've talked to her a few times on facebook.
Jenn: Oh, you two have been talking again? Wow.
Me: It's not a big deal. Stop being insecure. I love you.
No response yet. Oh life.
I rarely ever blog anymore, and if I do, I usually have to choose my words carefully because I do have some people that are very close to me who read my other blog.
I can’t stop thinking about Jamie. I want to write about this because I can’t talk about it with a lot of people.
Jenn: Yeah, shes hurt and broken hearted as fuck, you know? I am going back to bed. You have a good day too. Can't believe you was all rude to me when I said hi. It's whatever. Was hoping someday we could be friends you know but I guess I thought those couple of days meant something too.
Me: I was rude? I walked right up to you and apologized for not noticing that you spoke to me and made small talk. How is that rude? Whatever. Bye.
Jenn: I started talking and you walked away. It's cool. I just thought I meant a lot more, if nothing else, as a friend. I do hope you find what you're looking for and I do care and love you very much. I hope you don't forget about all the almost last year or me ever cause I never will you.
Jenn: Wow, k? Funny how you say shit like that but it's not okay for anyone to say it to you...
Me: You know..in recent times..I would have rather gotten a K from you than nothing. But all I got was nothing. And yesterday showed me how it's gonna be. And I don't want any part of it. You wanna act like strangers? Not text me all fucking day unless I text first? Get the fuck out of my life then. I'm not listening to a goddamn word you say anymore. If you want to be my friend, YOU will do what you have to. YOU will prove it. But I know you won't. You'll let me walk right out of your life and wave goodbye as i'm leaving. Well that's fine. I'm not trying with you anymore. You need to do your part. And if you don't, then bye.
Jenn: Really Nikki? I was putting effort into us, then you leave here after the two days with me and text me saying you want to be just friends. I don't know why you bothered spending two days the way we did and I said I wanted to be friends but I thought it would be awhile cuz your bullshit lies in those 2 days hurt me.Even so, I did what you asked, than at Pride you chose to walk away after your best friend told you I said hello.
Jenn: It feels like you never cared or loved me and that's sad as fuck to me.
Me: Are you retarded? She told me and that's when I walked right up to you, what the fuck? Also I was drunk AND high so calm the fuck down. Also, I said I only wanna be friends because you have shown that you aren't gonna change at all! I still love you and if you changed, i'd probably beg for you back. But i'm not gonna do that when I know you can't fucking prove to me that i'm a mother fucking priority. I am SO SICK of it. I'm literally done. It's your problem now.
Me: Are you retarded?